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I laid on my carpet staring at the ceiling fan. The president stood still, my eyes focused on the gold trim of his stitch-lettered shirt. This time, I needed to take it. I was dismantling this patriarchal house, I'd tell myself, one shot glass at a time. I knew I was gay on the first day of summer camp. We found out that while he was in LA he had contracted spinal meningitis and died. I was mortified…and I was gay.

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My social life was transformed.

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If you have an older Salon account, please enter your username and password below: We told them who we were and you could tell that they were taken aback. That was always the caveat. My circumstances have changed a lot since college, but the men I date are largely the same.

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